Kite inflation service now offered at the sandbar

NateDogg · Since 05 Mar 2005 627 Posts I caught your mom on cineaptic.com

For those who didn't get it the first time...

It's come to my attention recently that some people, not necessarily on this forum, might voice strong complaints about kiters possibly being forced to inflate their kites by hand, causing them to have to work harder than the windsurfers. For these poor souls, I have a solution:

I'll work with the Port of Hood River to partition my very own parking spot on the northern edge of the sandbar parking lot, a perfect locations to catch all the action on the water.

When sedentary souls pull up to park in my spot, I'll cheerily greet them, pack up all their brand new, fresh '07 and a half gear for them and promptly rush it down to the farthest point on the sandbar. I will then lay out their kite, unwind their lines and inflate their kite using a traditional double action hand pump.

No need to get out of the car because this is a full service operation! I will even go as far as having one of my assistants launch your kite, but not a minute before I fix your narrow stance, chop off your dongle and shorten your front lines. Once your gear is dialed, suicide leash attached and kite launched, I'll grab your board and proceed to session for several hours.

Seriously folks, no tips please, this service is all-inclusive. You can even hit up Micky D's down the street if you feel a bit tuckered out from watching your gear and I work so hard. Don't worry, your gear won't even notice.

Hein will be offering golf cart shuttles for adventurous kiters wishing to get a closer view. Only Hein drives though, and has first dibs on any alcoholic beverages you may have chosen to bring. Hein is also not responsible for any 'unfortunate' accidents that may occure along the way due to the consumption of said alcoholic beverages.

Once your gear is done, I'll land it, deflate it, neatly pack it up and run it back to you and your vehicle quicker than you can finish your big 'n tasty. A handshake, a smile and a benny in my pocket later and you're on your way. You even keep the suicide leash! What a deal...cuz that's just the kind of guy I am.

Seriously though....you guys are killing me

NateDogg · Wed Apr 04, 07 5:14 pm

Don't get me wrong though...power at the sandbar would be nice. Then, instead of getting a compressor, you spend a quarter of the money on a kegerator and use the rest of the money to stock it. Then we can PARTY

stringy · Since 23 Jun 2006 1738 Posts vancouver XTreme Poster

In Mui Ne, they have the locals working as kite caddies. They will help you rig, pump, launch, catch, keep an eye on you while you kite and even undo your rat's nest all you have to do is tip. Maybe we could get some Visas over to them, because I think it would be hard to find anyone in HR that would work as hard for so little.

stringy

forrest · Wed Apr 04, 07 6:25 pm

I bet some of the local kids would love to make a couple bucks per kite they pump up. When I have kids, they'll be running caddy service for all my friends at whatever kite beach we're at. Put those little people to work!

Kataku2k3 · Since 14 Aug 2005 3753 Posts Los Angeles, CA Videographer

Word, Nate! Thumb's Up

Kraemer · Since 24 Apr 2006 1736 Posts Sky Pilot Unicorn Captain

Excellent!

pkh · Since 27 Feb 2005 6549 Posts Couve / Hood Honored Founder

Ha Nate easy for you to say, where your headed you got an air compressor. Wink

NateDogg · Wed Apr 04, 07 8:11 pm

Exactly

I'll have to get a picture of me pumping up a kite by hand with the air compressor in the background just to spite you

Tony · Since 28 Aug 2006 940 Posts Portland Opinionated

tstansbury · Since 06 Jun 2006 649 Posts Rowena and P.C Addicted

We need the ladies from the speed trap video. You may have to tip a little more but they look like they were built to pump up kites.